Sunday, December 28, 2008

Gain a Little? Feeling Discouraged? Never Fear - I Have Just the Theory For You!

So, in case anyone doesn't already know, this is officially Natalie's blog. This means that she gets to do all the "administrative" blog stuff - like decide what goes on her sidebar. When I stopped by to check out the old Skinny Pants blog today, one question immediately popped into my mind.

Where the heck did she find that picture of me sitting at the table waiting to stuff my face with giant cookies? Seriously. Does anyone doubt that the chick in the picture MUST be me? It's so obvious. Natalie, you are amazing.

Speaking of the cookie exchange, the damage results were officially in three days ago. Please don't ask me to divulge the ridiculous incremental increase that showed up on the bathroom scale, because it would be too painful to make it public. There is, however, some good news.

I have another theory. Kind of like the one about fat cells holding their breath when you lose weight, this one concerns itself with gaining weight. You know how people fall off the wagon for a few days, eat till they're sick, and get that bloated/gained-five-plus-pounds feeling? Well, I'm here to tell you that this feeling is nothing more than another sneaky trick of those greedy little fat cells.

Think about it. When the binge is over, and the scale weighs in the disastrous results, what happens? The victim immediately gets depressed over the sudden weight gain, and gets discouraged. And what is it we usually do when discouraged? Give in and eat. This is all part of the sinister fat cells' evil plan, and no girl should ever fall for it again!

Here's the theory. Just like it takes the fat cells a while to actually admit the fat is gone, they can't really soak up new fat that quick either - they just want you to think they did so you'll give up and feed their greedy little selves. In reality (according to my non-professional theory), the surplus of fat and calories you consumed is only floating around the fat cells. The only way they can actually hang onto the new fat, is if you keep feeding them more so that the "extra" is still extra. Does that make sense?

If - instead of giving up and continuing the bad food binge - you recommence the starving-of-the-fat-cells, all that extra will be quickly used up by your body, and the fat cells lose. Oh sure, they might manage to secure a pound or two, but isn't that way better than handing over the total victory of five or ten pounds??? So if you've been bad and the scale confirms it, remember - it's just an illusion. So, instead of giving up and getting discouraged, get determined instead and fight back. Whatever it is you do to keep off weight and/or lose a little, get right back on it! Be super good, don't get on the scale for three days, and when you do you'll see that at least half of what you thought you'd gained isn't really there at all.

I still say that half the battle is mental. To some extent, you really can "think yourself thin" - or fat, depending on what you tell yourself. So if you've been bad this Christmas season, don't give up, and don't give in. Fight back and don't give any ground to those stupid little fat cells waiting to ruin all your plans. And remember, every time you allow yourself to feel discouraged, you give them the edge, so keep positive!

Happy New Year everyone! Good luck with those resolutions!


Natalie said...


A. I'm glad you like the hungry cookie chick. I did think she went well with your last post.

B. I'm hoping that your theory is true and that my fat cells aren't really holding on to this nice new birth control weight gain. I lost 19 lbs, started birth control & packed 14 of those lbs. back on in under two weeks (without eating any differently.) So not fair. Hopefully my fat cells are just trying to use this as an excuse to break me down. Well, it's not gonna happen! I can be just as stubborn as they can!

Jen said...

Natalie, that is the pits!! Seriously, it is really not fair. What does your friendly doctor have to say about that?

Annie Valentine said...

This is so motivating and true. I think I must link you up.

R Max said...

Blew my resolutions already and I just made them yesterday.

I may start thinking about the possibility of walking on my clothesline (sorry... I mean, TREADMILL) again soon.

If I can be bothered.

Jennifer Brindley said...

This really HAS to be true. I bet you're hiding a degree in fatcellology under your bed.

After the horrible holidays and the naughty eating I did, I gained a few pounds, of course. But today is the 11th of January and I'm back to a 7-ish pound weight loss so far. :)

The trick is not to give in, and keep at it. One of my (very fit, hot) friends says "The body will come as a result of the lifestyle."


~Jenn (Ex Hot Girl)